We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
Randomize
