she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
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