plz talk dirty to me
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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