The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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