So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
