mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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