Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
