Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize
