Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
sarcasm needs its own font
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
