WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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