omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
