Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Before we fucked we both mutually agreed not to tweet about it.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize