these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
