windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
