she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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