i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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