Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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