I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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