the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
