He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
