is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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