what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
