guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
