I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
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