I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
