You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
