The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Randomize
