Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
