Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
