you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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