imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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