I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
