all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Randomize
