I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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