he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
