I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
