how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize