omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
