Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
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