I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize
