HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Randomize
