found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
