Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize
