We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
dude. I can hear the air.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
