I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Randomize
