I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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