Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize