i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
