I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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