from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
