Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
