Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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